An Introvert

I was a consistent honor student in my old school. From nursery until fourth year high school, I was always on the list. It’s not easy studying in my former school since the passing grade was seventy-five percent in elementary and intermediate level and sixty-five percent in high school level. Every time my former school conducts a parent-teacher conference, my teacher would commend me to my parents, saying I did well in this subject, or that I’m polite and attentive in class. After which, she would tell them what I need to improve.

Every school year, my teachers would say the same thing I need to improve to get higher grades than I have. Then, my mom and I would have the same talk and give me advice. I must tell you that it was very deafening to hear the same comment every year. What my teachers told my parents was that I was never reciting in the class. And if I do, you can actually count it using your fingers. That’s my weakness. I was never a speaker.

There is a reason why I don’t recite in class. It’s that if I would speak out my mind, I want either to be commended or not to be noticed by people because humiliation does not wear off immediately. It doesn’t help when people keep on judging and mocking my pronunciation. I should tell you that my confidence had worn off and reached its lowest point. I took several measures to improve myself. My sister used to flash some cards with words written on it and I would recite them. I would read lots of paragraph and would search if I don’t know how to pronounce the words.

I don’t want to give up because one day, I know it would come in handy just like what Sir Valois keeps on telling us. That’s why up to this day, I must say I’m still struggling. I’m still trying hard. And I’m still facing my weakness, turning it into strength because I’d like believe what Ralph Waldo Emerson once said that our strength grows out of our weaknesses.

Copyright © 2012 Em Luzande. All rights reserved.